Grief
by Pendragon2601
Summary: Kit discovers that not every one of the Blackthorns has survived the fight in the Council Hall and has to comfort Ty as much as he can manage. Spoilers for Lord of Shadows. With cameos from Magnus, Alec, Helen and Aline. Also MERRY CHRISTMAS!


_Hello everybody!  
_

 _I am so incredibly sorry that it has taken me so long to update or publish anything new in a while. I have been really busy starting college, moving flats, applying to university and on top of all that my laptop had been out of order for pretty much six months, so since I've had it fixed I've been writing as much as I could in between doing coursework and everything else. But enough of that now, onwards!_

 _First off, HOLY HELL did LOS mess me up! This story has literally come from that last chapter so spoilers in advance. I can not wait to read QOAD when it eventually comes out. I have never felt more emotionally traumatised than reading the end of that book. I also absolutely love Ty, Kit and Livvy! The whole Kit/Ty ship is definitely a firm second in my favourite couples in the series, directly under Malec of course. But Livvy...! Still upset even now.  
_

 _I've worked really hard on this story, so I hope that you guys will all like it. I'll see if I can post a happier story in a bit once I've had some sleep and am not having to look after my nephew so much later on._

 _Also, I know this might seem a little controversial but for some reason, I think there's more to Zara's character than she's just letting out at the moment which is why I specifically left that line in later on._

 _SPOILERS for LORD OF SHADOWS. I'm sorry if the ending of this comes across as a little out of character or too cheesy but I did my best on having no sleep for 2 days straight._

 _Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters, they all belong to the lovely Cassandra Clare._

 _Please let me know what you think or if there is any improvements I could make. But if you are going to leave some feedback, please be as constructive as you can._

 _Enjoy!_

* * *

 **The Dark Artifices**

 **Grief**

Kit gripped the curtain rail tightly in his hands as he stared at the door, ready to swing his makeshift weapon at the head of anyone who dared to come in and attack him. He had heard the screaming and shouting from the council hall, even from this far away but now it had gone silent. It made him nervous, especially now that Kieran had disappeared on him and he was left on his own to protect an unconscious warlock.

 _Come on guys, what's going on?_ He bit his lip anxiously. He wondered whether he should just peek through the door to see whether anyone was coming his way, but then he heard a soft groan come from behind him. He spun around to find Magnus slowly waking up with a frown on his face.

"Alexander..." he mumbled waving his hand aimlessly beside his head.

"Magnus...? Magnus, Alec isn't here. It's just me," Kit said as he reached out and grasped Magnus's hand in his own. He spotted a smile appear on Magnus's face as the warlock shifted on his side towards him on the couch. "Magnus, can you hear me? It would be really good if you could wake up and help me out here."

"Alexander, I'm so sorry I passed out," Magnus muttered as he turned his head and pressed his lips to the back of Kit's hand. Kit held his breath and felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment. It appeared that Magnus didn't recognise him at all, as if he was just seeing his beloved instead. "I hope you weren't too worried, darling. You know I hate it when you're upset..."

"Magnus, it's Kit, remember? Alec's not here at the moment, he had to go and do something but he'll be back soon." Kit sighed whilst he tried to pull his hand away.

The sound of the door opening behind them made Kit scramble around, dropping the curtain rail in his hands and raising his hands into fists in front of his face. Kit stared up in surprise to see Alec standing in the doorway, a tight grim expression on his face as if he was trying to hold something back, before his gaze fell on Magnus. Kit watched as Alec let out a sigh of relief as he dropped by his side and pulled Magnus into a tight hug, his face hidden in his boyfriend's shoulder.

"Alexander, dear," Magnus chuckled as he happily hugged him back. "Darling, I knew you would be worried but I'm okay now, see...Alexander?"

Kit frowned at the couple before his attention was called to a number of people piling in through the doorway. First to come through was Helen and Aline, leading a bawling Drusilla into the room. Next came Mark carrying Ty in his arms, his little brother's dark head lolling back against his shoulder.

Kit stood up in alarm. "Ty! What's happened to him? Is he alright?"

"He'll be fine, don't worry. He's gone through a shock." Helen said, turning to him and putting a comforting hand on his shoulder in an almost motherly gesture. "It's Kit, isn't it?"

"Yeah, I..." he nodded absently as he watched Mark gently place Ty on the couch opposite Magnus. Kit couldn't take his eyes off Ty's sleeping face. His hair was messy and sticking to his forehead with sweat, his skin pale and gaunt. Kit thought back to the commotion he heard earlier coming from the council hall and he swallowed nervously. "What's going on? What happened earlier?"

Helen opened her mouth to speak but no words came out. Kit turned to her with a frown and saw her blue green eyes welling with tears. It was only now that he finally took notice of everyone in the room. Mark was sat on the floor by Ty's side, his head in his hands as tears slipped down his face. Aline was holding Drusilla tightly to her chest as the young girl sobbed into the woman's shirt. Alec was silent as he tightly held Magnus against him, but Magnus was quietly whispering in his ear as he rubbed soothing circles on his back.

The door suddenly opened as Emma walked into the room. She came to a stop with her hand still on the doorknob, holding Cortana limply in her other hand and gazed blankly around the room, her eyes rimmed red with unshed tears. There was no one else behind her.

Kit frowned as he took notice that there was two people missing from the room. "Emma, where's Julian and Livvy?"

Emma suddenly let out a choked sob, Cortana falling to the floor with a clatter. Helen went over to her and pulled her into a tight embrace, tears spilling down her cheeks just as Julian appeared behind his parabatai, carrying something large in his arms.

Kit suddenly felt like the floor had been pulled from under him as his gaze fell upon Julian as he carried the silent, unmoving body of Livvy into the room and collapsed to his knees, still cradling his sister's body to his chest. Kit felt the room spin as he turned and stumbled to a corner, vomiting on the floor.

 _Livvy is dead..._ Kit thought as he shakily braced himself against the wall and vomited again. He felt his knees buckle beneath him as he slumped against the wall, wishing that he could fall into unconsciousness and pretend that it was all a horrible nightmare. But he was unfortunately not afforded that luxury as he heard a heart breaking wail of grief from behind him. He looked over his shoulder to find Ty had woken and was crying, his gaze never faltering as he stared at his twin. Ty rose from where he had laid and collapsed to the floor beside Julian, his hands shakily hovering over Livvy's hair, wanting to touch her but unable to bear the thought of doing so, his body shaking with sobs.

"No, no, no, no, _Livvy..._ " Ty cried, shaking his head in disbelief. "No, why Livvy? Why her, too? Bring her back!"

Julian shook his head as he cried, rocking Livvy in his arms. Kit felt a tear slip down his cheek as he watched Ty beg his brother to bring his twin back, knowing in his heart that it was impossible. Livvy was gone. She was never coming back no matter how many times he begged.

* * *

Two days had passed since Kit had discovered Livvy was dead. The Blackthorns were struggling to come to terms with what they had lost. Drusilla refused to talk to anyone, preferring to stay as far away from her family as possible. Helen tried her best to be there for her siblings but frequently turned to her wife Aline for comfort. Emma stuck close to Julian's side as he grieved. When Julian had called for Tavvy to be returned to them so that he could tell his little brother the news, Kit couldn't bear to be in the room.

Ty was inconsolable.

He hadn't left his twin's body in the last two days. He barely ate, he barely slept, he didn't even change his clothes. Whenever Julian went to check on him, he would come back with tears welling in his eyes each time. "He's muttering his thoughts again, Emma. I don't know how to help him..." Julian moaned as Emma held him in her arms. Kit hadn't meant to eavesdrop but like the rest of the Blackthorns, he was worried about Ty.

There was nothing they could do to bring Livvy back even if they wanted to. The Unseelie King had kidnapped Annabel with the Black Volume in a swirl of black smoke. Magnus was still too ill to perform any magic and he was doing his best to support Alec and his family after the death of the Inquisitor, who Kit had later find out was Alec's father. But even if they did have all of these things, Kit wasn't entirely sure it was right to resurrect Livvy anyway. It didn't seem like the kind of thing Livvy would want. And so, the Blackthorns were forced to grieve.

Kit was slowly making his way to the viewing chamber where he knew Livvy's body was lying. He couldn't stop thinking of a conversation that he had with Livvy before she died. It was shortly after they had been evacuated to the London Institute and they had been sitting in the library, researching into Malcolm's past. Ty was sat at the table surrounded by old dusty books and scrolls with his headphones around his neck whilst Livvy and Kit had been sat by one of the bookshelves, ready to pass Ty anything he needed when he asked. Kit remembered looking at Ty and thinking how his headphones seemed odd compared to the old-fashioned clothes he was wearing.

"Livvy, why does Ty keep calling me Watson?" Kit frowned, glancing over at her as she perused the bookshelves.

She shrugged her shoulders as she tucked a lock of her brown hair behind her ear. "You know he's into Sherlock Holmes. You're the Watson to his Sherlock."

"Surely, you would be Watson. You've known him longer."

Livvy unrolled a scroll that she had picked up from a shelf above her head, letting out a bored sigh before handing to Kit to hold. "Watson didn't know Sherlock at first. They just shared an apartment together. But you make him better. He thinks outside the box when you're around him."

Kit nodded quietly, looking over at Ty contemplatively. A sly grin appeared on his face as he turned back to Livvy. "So, considering we kissed, does that make you Mary Watson?"

Livvy rolled her eyes with a scoff. "You wish. I like to think of myself as Irene Adler or maybe Mycroft."

Kit scrunched his nose at the thought. "Didn't Sherlock have a thing for Irene? That's gross."

Livvy paused in thought before she shuddered. "Yeah, you're right. Mycroft it is, then."

"Map." Ty suddenly called, holding his hand out towards them without looking up from the table.

"Which one?" Livvy replied. There were dozens of scrolls all rolled up on the shelves behind him.

Ty looked up with a crease on his brow. "Um, I need a map of Cornwall dating the time that Malcolm had lived there with Annabel."

"What year?"

Ty let out a huff as one of his hands anxiously patted the side of his hip. Kit stood up and gathered a few scrolls in his arms. "Here, let's look through these. One of them might be what we're looking for." Kit said calmly as he placed them on the table. Ty nodded and let out a sigh of relief, slipping on his headphones and returning his attention to his task.

Kit felt a hand on his shoulder and he turned to see Livvy looking at him. "I told you."

Now that he thought about that conversation, he felt sick to his stomach. He had forgotten at the time that Mary Watson had died in the books...

Pushing open the door to the viewing chamber, he spotted Livvy's body lying on a plinth in the centre of the room under a white shroud and he felt his stomach clench. He took a slow deep breath to calm the nauseous feeling creeping up his throat.

He wasn't surprised to find Ty sitting on a bench a few feet away from Livvy's body, his body still but his hands moving just like they always did. Kit walked over and sat down quietly next to him, not too close but close enough for Ty to be aware that he wasn't alone. Sitting this close to him, he could see Ty's lips forming words but Kit couldn't hear what he was saying.

Kit wanted to reach out to him but he knew it wouldn't help Ty at all. Kit let out a sigh and started to talk. "It does get easier Ty. I'm not saying that it will happen immediately, believe me I know, but it does get easier."

Ty fell silent, his mouth forming a tight line as Kit continued to speak. "I still miss my dad. He was the only family I had, you know? But you still have Julian. You still have Mark and Dru and Emma... You still have them-"

"I saw you kiss Livvy," Ty interrupted, glancing towards Kit but not meeting his eyes as the long white fingers on his left hand started to drum against his knee. "When we went to check the wards around the Institute, I turned around for just a second and I saw you kiss her."

Kit fell silent as he stared at Ty in astonishment. This wasn't exactly where he thought this conversation was going to go. He felt a tight feeling of panic in his chest. "Ty, I - She asked me to kiss her. I wouldn't ever force myself on Livvy, or anyone, I wouldn't dare-"

"I know." Ty said calmly, looking up at Kit's face. "Livvy never did anything she didn't want to do."

Kit felt a sad smile appear on his face as he thought back to when Livvy had asked him to kiss her. "Yes, I suppose she didn't, did she?"

"Did you want to kiss her? Were you in love with her?"

"What? No, I liked Livvy but I wouldn't say I was in love with her. We barely knew each other. But when a pretty girl asks you to kiss her, you don't say no, do you?" Kit sighed with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders. Kit glanced over at Ty and suddenly felt a deep wave of guilt hit his chest as he noticed a small crease appear on Ty's brow. "Oh god, I'm sorry. I shouldn't be talking about this right now."

"Why not?" Ty said with a note of confusion. Kit stared at him, feeling speechless that he would even ask a question like that. Did Ty honestly not realise that there was a time and a place for these types of conversations? Or was it like that with all Shadowhunters? With everything that Kit knew about Shadowhunters or had been told about them, they didn't exactly strike him as compassionate beings.

"Ty, I shouldn't be talking about kissing Livvy right now when her body is..." Kit gestured towards the plinth in the room as his sentence trailed off into silence. "Look, there's a time and a place, Ty, but right now isn't it. I mean it's weird enough that I'm talking about kissing her with you as it is-"

"Why? Is it because she's my twin? _Was_ my twin, I mean," Ty said, quickly correcting himself with a frown. His fingers began to drum a different beat against his thigh, the rhythm slightly faster and more jittery than the last. "It's okay, Livvy wouldn't have minded. We used to talk about everything with each other. It was the only time when things actually started to make sense to me."

"Oh. Sorry, I didn't think of it like that."

"Besides, it doesn't matter to me what Livvy did as long as she was okay with it. It was her business what she got up to." Ty looked up at Kit suddenly with an intense look. "Julian's the protective brother if that's what you're worried about."

Kit nodded seriously. "I'll keep that in mind. Not that I'm thinking of kissing Dru or anything like that..." he added hastily as he felt his face begin to warm with embarrassment.

A small crease appeared on Ty's brow before he turned his gaze away towards the plinth where his twin lay. "I never understood that. Kissing, I mean. I can understand the mechanics behind it, and I understand that it's supposed to feel good, but I just don't get why people put so much emphasis on it. Why is your first kiss supposed to be special?" Ty said, his hands moving agitatedly in his lap. "And I don't understand why people would want to be so close like that. It makes me uncomfortable just holding someone's hand, let alone..."

"It's okay if you don't understand it. Not many people do."

"Livvy understood things like that..." Ty said quietly, as he started to rock back and forward in his seat. Kit wrapped his arms tightly around Ty's shoulders, pulling him into his side. He somehow knew this was what Ty needed even if he didn't say it out loud. "What am I going to do now, Kit? I can't do this on my own, I can't do this without Livvy. But she's gone now and she's not coming back. W-what am I going to do?"

"Listen to me Ty, you are going to be fine. You've still got the rest of your family. They're not going to let Annabel or the Cohort get away with Livvy's death. And you've still got me. I'm not going anywhere."

"It's all my fault." moaned Ty as his grey eyes began to well with tears.

"No, it's not. Why would you ever think that?"

"If I hadn't left that letter for Annabel, she wouldn't have found us. She wouldn't have testified. She wouldn't have freaked out and killed the Inquisitor and she wouldn't have killed Livvy. It's my fault!"

"You couldn't have known that would happen, Ty. No one could."

"I should have known. I know what the Cohort are like. I should have known!" Ty's voice came out as a hoarse moan, his whole body shaking with so much emotion that Kit was struggling to keep hold of him.

"Ty, you can't beat yourself up about this. This isn't your fault. It's the Cohort's fault that she's dead, not yours." Kit said firmly, tightening his grip on Ty's shoulders in comfort not only for Ty but partly for himself as well. He hadn't felt this sad since he witnessed his father's death. Kit wondered if he would have to get used to it now that he was living as a full-fledged Shadowhunter.

"But she's gone…" Ty moaned into Kit's shoulder, tears flowing down his face as if a dam had suddenly broken and it was unleashing a lifetimes worth of sorrow. "First it was mother, then it was father and now Livvy. Everybody leaves me Kit…"

Kit didn't know what to say. He couldn't think of any words that would give Ty any comfort, so he just let him cry it out on to his shoulder. Even when Ty had stopped shaking and was starting to dry his face with the cuff of his shirt sleeve, Kit didn't let go. He almost missed what Ty mumbled to him before he pulled out of Kit's arms and let out a small dejected breath. "Thank you, Kit."

Kit blinked and nodded, shrugging his shoulders awkwardly in a move that he had hoped would look nonchalant. "It's no problem. I don't mind. If you ever feel the need to let it all out again, you let me know."

"No, I meant thank you for kissing Livvy. I'm glad that she got to have that experience before she died." Ty looked down at the floor. For a fraction of a second, Kit caught a small wisp of a smile appear on Ty's mouth before it was gone, vanished into a tight line.

Kit smiled quietly to himself, suddenly feeling a bold wave of pride fill up his chest. "Hey Ty, I was wondering if you'd ever kiss-"

Kit suddenly fell silent as he felt Ty reach out and grab his hand tightly in his own. He stared at Ty in shock, holding his breath as Ty stared pointedly at Livvy's body. Kit could see that Ty was uncomfortable with touching his hand. His whole posture was tense and his left hand was clenching and unclenching into a fist, but Kit didn't dare move. He somehow knew that he needed this, just like he knew to put his arms around his shoulders to calm him down earlier.

He didn't know how long Ty held his hand, whether it was a minute or an hour, but when he finally let go he watched Ty let out a slow breath. Kit felt his mouth beginning to form a wide grin, his cheeks aching with the stretch after not been used for some time.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realise anyone was in here."

Kit turned to the sound of the voice and felt his mouth form a sneer as Zara Dearborn stood in the doorway, her long dark hair tied back into a tight bun. Kit felt Ty move from beside him as he stood protectively in front of Livvy's body, his bright grey eyes full of grief and fury as he stared down at Zara. "Get out." He snarled.

Zara didn't move, except to straighten her back, as if she was preparing herself for a fight. Kit moved to stand beside Ty, his arms crossed in front of his chest. "I only came to pay my respects to the deceased. The loss of a Shadowhunter is unforgivable and Annabel will be found and brought to justice."

"The _deceased…_ " Ty glared at Zara, his hands clenching into tight fists in anger. "Livvy was my sister, _my_ _twin_. You have no right to say goodbye to her."

Zara flinched, her eyes widening in surprise as she stared at Ty. It was as if she hadn't been expecting Ty to speak to her like that, not with such intensity or with such loathing. "I am sorry for your loss, I-"

"You're not sorry." Kit sneered, taking a step toward her. Zara stood still her eyes watching his every move warily. "You're just feeling guilty for your part in her death. If you had any decency, any humanity left at all, you'd leave the Blackthorns alone. And the Lightwoods. You've already done enough damage."

Kit felt her gaze fall on him as she looked him up and down before taking a step back. Zara nodded with an appraising look on her face as she observed Kit. "You've got some fight in you, Herondale. That's good. We could use some of that at the Scholomance."

"Well, you can keep looking." Kit replied through gritted teeth.

Zara's mouth suddenly pulled into a sneer before she turned towards the door. Before her hand touched the doorknob, she turned to Kit one last time. "You know, I'm not the bad guy here." Zara said quietly before she continued on her way, closing the door behind her slowly.

Kit let out a slow breath and turned to Ty with a shudder. "God, she makes my skin crawl. Are you alright?" Kit asked with concern as he spotted Ty's hands fidgeting at his sides again. Ty nodded and turned to Livvy's plinth, staring sadly at her sleeping face.

Kit joined him at the plinth and looked down at her face too. She seemed so peaceful, as if she was asleep. Her long brown hair was arranged around her face lovingly, each lock brushed carefully and delicately. Her sabre had been placed on her front, held in place underneath her hands. Kit wondered which of her siblings had placed her beloved weapon with her. He can't imagine that the Clave would approve of vital weapons being left with the dead ready to be cremated to ash with their previous owners.

Ty reached out and lightly touched her hair, before he leaned down to whisper in her ear. Kit couldn't make out the words he was using, but he assumed that it was in the secret language that he only spoke to Livvy with. He had heard them speak to each other with it before, often when they had been alone in the library or when they were making their way to the Shadow Market. Ty swallowed anxiously before he moved away, unable to look at his sister anymore as more tears slipped down his face.

"Goodbye Livvy." He whispered brushing his fingers lightly against her cheek before he followed after Ty. Kit felt his eyes welling up with tears.

Kit didn't know what was going to happen to them all now that the Clave knew that Julian had been running the Institute in secret without a guardian. The whole world around them seemed to be falling apart and there was nothing they could do to stop it. Everything just seemed so uncertain to Kit. But he knew one thing at least that gave him a little comfort and a purpose. He isn't going to leave the Blackthorns. He is going to help them to grieve. He is going to help them avenge their sister's death because like it or not, the Blackthorns were his family now and he was going to protect them even if it is the last thing he will ever do.


End file.
